More on change.

I realized earlier today that I think one key to lifelong happiness is a true understanding of the concept that things are constantly changing. People change, their opinions and attitudes change, your place in life changes. Everything is always changing. I think maybe one reason I go through dips (and probably a lot of people) is because I have a really hard time dealing with change. Actually, scratch that. Unless it involves a new outfit or salary bump, I dont like change very much.
I think it's because I'm usually passionate about things - I'm even passionate about being dispassionate...and because of that i get settled in my ways and I take a while to change with a change. By the time I get adjusted to a change, things change on me again. I'm going to try to be more accepting of change from now on cuz i think it'll make me happier.

I'm worlds better than I used to be though, that's for sure. Overall, I'm very very understanding of the idea that people change, and the idea that I change. In fact, i'm proud of the fact that I can change and recognize changes within me. But when other people change, I think my deep down initial reaction is fear. Fear that things will in turn change in a negative way for me. But soon enough, I get really excited about changes and less threatened by them. If only I could get rid of that initial punch of fear. That would be grand.

I think that a lot of people don't genuinely understand the dynamics of change. And instead of going with it, all these other emotions come up. Envy, insecurity, disappointment, hatred...feelings that inspire judgement and backtalk. It's a different, and in my opinion, more destructive way of coping with change. I used to be like that - but that's changing now, and nearly out of my system. It feels good to be more understanding about change - it makes my life feel more secure and able to deal with ups and downs. It also feels so Good to be happy for people instead of scared for yourself. Almost relaxing but more liberating. It feels good like sweating really hard after a really good hard run. I just wish I could be like that always. Hmph.